Mark Twain's Letters from the Earth is a brilliant and incredibly imaginative take on the story of the Bible itself. Starting with the creation of the. This document was prepared for Arthur's Classic Novels from borrowed Naked Word etext. Markup is by Arthur Wendover. Jul. Free kindle book and epub digitized and proofread by Project Gutenberg.
|Language:||English, Spanish, German|
|ePub File Size:||26.33 MB|
|PDF File Size:||13.15 MB|
|Distribution:||Free* [*Regsitration Required]|
Letters From The Earth by Mark Twain originally written in , according to Mark Twain A to . the earth, yet is quite sure he will like them in heaven. Isn't it. It makes me laugh. He was sarcastic and insightful. A more polite Hitchens. He dissects the curious idiocy of the biblical account and shines a. Letters from the Earth is a posthumously published work of celebrated American author Mark Twain (–) collated by Bernard DeVoto. It comprises essays written during a difficult time in Twain's life (–09), . retrieved ; ^ "Rockefeller Gift To Kill 'Hookworm'" (PDF), The New York Times, p. 1, October.
To ask other readers questions about Letters from the Earth , please sign up. They worship no god; and if we in goodness of heart do send a missionary to show them the way of life, they listen with respect to all he hath to say, and then they eat him. It is murder all along the line. Long before today's crop of posturing, pompous-ass religious critics, Twain did it better, faster and funnier. The best parts were the sections where Mark Twain translated the ancient diaries of the Adam Family as in Adam and Eve. However, he included similar ideas in both "The Mysterious Stranger" and Letters From the Earth , and they are both better books as they demo This collection of largely unpublished material is the most impressive contribution to books by Mark Twain after "The Mysterious Stranger" of , with which it shares an imaginative grandeur.
First edition. Collated by Bernard DeVoto .
Carefully preserved among the sacred archives of this curious community is a MSS. It is written on vellum, and is some four or five thousand years old. Nothing but bucksheesh can purchase a sight. Its fame is somewhat dimmed in these latter days, because of the doubts so many authors of Palestine travels have felt themselves privileged to cast upon it. Speaking of this MSS. The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking.
Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before him rose the black night of Space, like a wall. His mighty bulk towered rugged and mountain-like into the zenith, and His divine head blazed there like a distant sun.
At His feet stood three colossal figures, diminished to extinction, almost, by contrast -- archangels -- their heads level with His ankle-bone. In time, the Deity perceived that death was a mistake; a mistake, in that it was insufficient; insufficient, for the reason that while it was an admirable agent for the inflicting of misery upon the survivor, it allowed the dead person himself to escape from all further persecution in the blessed refuge of the grave.
This was not satisfactory. A way must be conceived to pursue the dead beyond the tomb.
Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very, very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel; at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable; and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm.
He took a pride in man; man was his finest invention; man was his pet, after the housefly. On the Bible It is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies.
During twenty-three days in every month in absence of pregnancy from the time a woman is seven years old till she dies of old age, she is ready for action, and competent. As competent as the candlestick is to receive the candle. Competent every day, competent every night.
Now he occupies a fair place far above the one I had previously given him due to my ignorance. Posted By Mr. Snob at Sat 28 Apr , 6: Please submit a quiz here. Here is where you find links to related content on this site or other sites, possibly including full books or essays about Mark Twain written by other authors featured on this site. Letters from the Earth Search. Advanced Search. Adventures of Tom Sawyer Comprehension: Mark Twain His Life and Writings: Adventures of Tom Sawyer: Twain's The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn: The Prince and the Pauper by Mark Twain: My Mark Twain by W.
About Mark Twain. Satan's Letter. Letter II.
Letter III. Letter IV. Letter V. Letter VI. How pale those speeches are in print, but how radiant, how full of color, how blinding they were in the delivery! It was a great night, a memorable night. I doubt if America has seen anything quite equal to it.
I am well satisfied I shall not live to see its equal again And I shall always see him, as he stood that night on a dinner-table, under the flash of lights and banners, in the midst of seven hundred frantic shouters, the most beautiful human creature that ever lived You should have seen that vast house rise to its feet; you should have heard the hurricane that followed.
That's the only test! People might shout, clap their hands, stamp, wave their napkins, but none but the master can make them get up on their feet. It is murder all along the line. Here are countless multitudes of creatures, and they all kill, kill, kill, they are all murderers.
And they are not to blame, Divine One? They worship no god; and if we in goodness of heart do send a missionary to show them the way of life, they listen with respect to all he hath to say, and then they eat him. This doth tend to hinder the spread of light. It is as if a lost and perishing person in a roasting desert should be told by a rescuer he might choose and have all longed-for things but one, and he should elect to leave out water! There is nothing resembling it at home.
The people are all insane, the other animals are all insane, the earth is insane, Nature itself is insane.
The report of my illness grew out of his illness, the report of my death was an exaggeration. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values. It consists -- utterly and entirely -- of diversions which he cares next to nothing about, here in the earth, yet is quite sure he will like them in heaven.
Isn't it curious? Isn't it interesting? You must not think I am exaggerating, for it is not so. I will give you details. The serpent said the forbidden fruit would store their vacant minds with knowledge. So they ate it, which was quite natural, for man is so made that he eagerly wants to know; whereas the priest, like God, whose imitator and representative he is, has made it his business from the beginning to keep him from knowing any useful thing.
I do not care what it expresses, and I cannot most always sometimes tell, generally, but expression is what I worship, it is what I glory in, with all my impetuous nature.
This was not satisfactory. A way must be conceived to pursue the dead beyond the tomb. The Deity pondered this matter during four thousand years unsuccessfully, but as soon as he came down to earth and became a Christian his mind cleared and he knew what to do.